Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Build a Digital Culture

Successful digital endeavors involve building a culture. It’s about understanding what your community of users value, rather than just examining their buying habits. It’s not about what you make, what you want to sell, or what your ad agency thinks is a clever way to message to them. Understand what they value, and they will reward you. Connect them with their interests, and they’ll remember you. Go out of your way to interrupt their conversation, and they’ll head for the door.

Communities, whether social or digital, are built around cultural beliefs. “Buying things” is not a cultural belief, no matter how much money has been spent trying to tell us otherwise. Being “talked at” is condescending, and oh so 20th Century.

Listen. Figure out what is real to people and why it's real to them. Enter the conversation with respect. Then build your culture around it.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Did you order the Hail Mary?


You just know this is what McCain is thinking:

"What I do want is for you to stand there in that
faggoty white uniform impeccable designer suit and with your Harvard mouth extend me some fucking courtesy."

If only Friday night had gone something like this:

Obama: Senator did you order the Hail Mary?

McCain: The press wants to question Sarah Palin, thinks she isn’t fit for the job. I don't give a damn what they think they’re entitled to.

Obama: Senator, Steve Schmidt ordered the Hail Mary because that’s what you told him to do.

FOX Noise: Object!

Lehrer:
Sustained.

Obama: And when it went bad, when Governor Palin was incoherent in front of Katie Couric...

FOX Noise:
Dammit Obama!

Obama: ...You suspended your campaign to cover it up. You'll cut her loose next week before she can go before Joe Biden!



FOX Noise: Consider yourself in Contempt of the Republican Party!

Obama: Senator did you order the Hail Mary?

McCain: You want answers?

Obama: I think we’re entitled.

McCain: You want answers?!

Obama: I want the truth!

McCain: I can’t handle the truth!

Son, we live in a world that has walls, walls that were torn down by great men like Ronald Reagan. And the remains of those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Whose gonna do it? You? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. I have to try to make something out of what's left of conservative ideology. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you and your elitist friends, can be pretty damn entertaining. You don't want the truth because deep down inside when you gather at your celebrity cocktail parties, you want me lying, you need me lying. We use words like honor, code, loyalty surge, nucular, doctrine. We use them as the backbone of a life trying to defend something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that the GOP has provided, and then questions if the manner is constitutional or not. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way.

Obama: Did you order the Hail Mary?

McCain: I did the job I...

Obama: Did you order the campaign suspension to cover up Sarah Palin's interview?

McCain: You’re Goddamned right I did!

-------------

Note: With all due respect to Maureen Dowd (one of my faves), the seed of this post was published in Open Thread on Friday night.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Brand McCain 08 Goods Available

The public demand was great, so I have acquiesced. You can now sport these fine campaign slogans on any number of items. Dig it here.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Brand McCain 08

Republicans have always benefited from superior brand marketing (who can forget mascots like Willie Horton and the Swift boat veterans), so why should the 2008 campaign be any different? I’m convinced that with spot-on messaging and just the right amount of creative sizzle, the American public will know exactly who they should cast their vote for on November 4th.

For media, I've chosen OOH—that's Out Of Home to us marketing types. It's also commonly known as yard signs.

Let’s start with the current campaign slogan: “Country First.” Me likey—short, memorable, connects with people. But does it say enough? Hmmm. It tells the voters why, but what about the how?

constitution

Now that’s what we in the business call “plussed.” Still short, still memorable, but works much harder.

It’s hard not to notice a great deal of media reporting regarding the factual inconsistencies in the standard McCain Palin stump speech. Apparently, some of this misleading language has even spilled over into the campaign’s TV advertisements. While certain statements may be out and out “false,” the fact still remains that a great deal of what they’re saying is true. Great brands always focus on what they do well while seeking to minimize any shortcomings. Let’s put that to work:

almost

That pretty much nails it. Turns a perceived negative into a positive. And—dare I say—it’s “catchy.”

Now, Sarah Palin. She came out of the gate smokin’, and while she still is smokin’ hot, (hey, sex still sells) her limited experience is beginning to make independent voters nervous. Time to put those fears to rest. No foreign policy experience? No problem.

russia

Let’s not miss the opportunity to capitalize on her recent photo-op at the United Nations while it’s still fresh in the public’s mind.

kissinger

Then there’s that whole Troopergate story that won’t go away. Why is it that these “bugs” have to come up right after you “go to market?” No matter, with enough righteous certitude, even the most cynical voter will have no choice but to admire Governor Palin’s single-mindedness.

subpoena

Plus, there are so many positives to talk about with this sassy product of America’s last wilderness. She can raise a family, govern the largest land-mass in the union and still find time for a little recreation.

wolves

Edgy and a pop culture reference. Never hurts to have a bit of that in your campaign. Speaks to the X Games demo.

There’s also this matter of the pesky economy which Senator McCain has openly admitted is not his strong suit. One minute you need to make people think it’s solid, the next minute you have to scare the public into thinking they might be standing in a breadline. How about updating that timeless Hoover populist slogan? With a bit of finesse we can even add a dash of Governor Palin’s larger-than-life-experience.

moose

Can you feel the connection, people?

I’m starting to think “The original mavericks” slogan is getting a little stale. The trick to good advertising is to say the same thing a little differently every time. That way your message refreshens in the consumer’s mind. So, a maverick in government does what? Gets rid of government, right? Therefore, we could say:

deregulators

Sweet. Nothing is more powerful than well-worded truths.

Let’s try to shore up one of Senator McCain’s major weaknesses—that famous ill temper. Messaged correctly, anger can also be interpreted as decisiveness. And if you want to talk decisiveness, you talk Sarah Palin. Problem solved. Now, deliver that message with her quaint twanginess, and we might have something. Or should I say, somethin’.

nucular

Confident, folksy, sticky. A nice little double entendre about your foreign policy strength, too. I say print it. Sarah also killed it during her interview with Charlie Gibson. Let's not let the adoring public forget about this moment.

blinkin

And while we’re at it, we all know that what you say isn’t nearly as important as how you say it.

coherent

And finally, there are those out there who would seek to question your age and fitness for the job of President of the United States. Utter nonsense. Those same people question your knowledge of economic matters. Let’s take the naysayers head on, with a powerful, succinct message that puts both issues to rest.

soundmind

But if none of this stems the tide, the campaign can always rely on one indisputable aspect of Governor Palin’s experience—as point guard of the Wasilla High School girl’s state championship basketball team.

timeout

The McCain Palin campaign needs professional help. We have to get these messages on the street pronto. There’s no time for fancy art direction, Mac production, 3 rounds of proofs, press checks, fulfillment and distribution. And, we have no budget. We need to spread the word virtually. Send these yard signs out in email, post them on your blog or add them to your social network page. There’s not a minute to lose.

Join Brand McCain 08 on Facebook today.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

What the…?

John McCain doesn't like Spain? Maybe he thinks we need an occupying army to plunder their olive supply.

The Ministry Officially Endorses Maraid

This is from Maraid who has a sweet collection of things on Flickr. No political spiel here, I just really dig the werewolf.

And now a word from our sponsors…




I know I only promised one per day, but they've got so many good messages to get out there.

Now that the waters have subsided, the needs are on the rise

Citizens, the good people at the American Red Cross (ARC) need our help.

In what should come as no great surprise, the public’s perception of what constitutes an “epic” storm has gradually been distorted over the years by our kingdom's hyperbolic media coverage. In the case of Hurricane Gustav, when the anticipated damage to New Orleans was less than expected (no breached levees, no bodies floating in the streets), the public’s attention moved elsewhere after the denizens of the 24/7 news cycle declared that “residents have dodged a bullet.” This media induced donor fatigue—that is, unless a storm produces Katrina-like biblical devastation it no longer requires as large a charitable outpouring—will continue to affect the ARC not only in 2008, but in years to come.


The reality is the ARC continues to feed and shelter those affected by the storm, regardless of the hurricane’s category, path or storm surge. What goes largely unseen is what the NY Times describes as “the secondary health emergency that follows a storm when there is no power, no water and no functioning sewers.” The general public needs to understand that while residents wait until it is safe to return to their affected communities, the ARC continues to provide them support in the form of food, shelter and fresh water.

This year’s hurricane season has been particularly active, following a spring/summer that saw unprecedented flooding and devastating damage from tornadoes. All of it has left the ARC's disaster relief fund in need of some serious love.


Here at the Ministry, we believe people want to do good, but they are becoming increasingly numb to the never-ending bad news cycle. More and more, they need to be reminded that even the smallest donation can make a difference.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

McCain/Palin yardsigns: collect 'em all


The Ministry has
all hands on deck helping the honorable Senator McCain and Frau Palin spread their fascist theology between now and November 4th. Check back each day for new yardsigns, or sign up for the MoI RSS feed and have them fresh on your desktop every morning. They're perfect for downloading, posting, or emailing to your undecided friends.

"The economy is fundamentally sound"

As compared to say, your judgment Senator McCain?

It's hard not to spot their latest tactic: doing interviews on MSNBC and then smugly responding to the anchor about "your party" or "your candidate." See for yourself.






What's funny about this is that Mika Brzezinski has had an obvious girl crush on Sarah Palin for the past two weeks. Mika's nagging wife act with Scarborough has become exponentially more and more annoying, but her
Palinfatuation pushed me over the edge. I can't even watch the damn show anymore. But, this gave me a chance to watch the Spongebob episode where Sandy sings the Texas song the other morning.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

MoI Feature: Name this shriveled celebrity


Be the first to answer correctly, and the Ministry of Initiatives will mail you an official MoI wall poster.

No, not the lipstick on a pig line…


The morning after Frau Palin's speech at the RNC, that very line popped into my head. As some of my former colleagues know, this phrase is near and dear to my heart. We recited it every time we walked out the door on a new business pitch. Someone even did some photoshop work and added lipstick to a photo of pig and hung it near the desk of our new business guy.

But knowing that I'm cynical, jaded and short-tempered (no, I'm not secretly John McCain), I didn't think it would be a good phrase to trot out in reference to our political opponents. Too easily turned around by the right, I nodded to myself.

So what does the "composed one" do? He delivers the line himself. Doh!

Yes, the proper analogy is that Sarah Palin is the
lipstick on the pig that is the conservative movement. But can we find a metaphor that's not shaped like a boomerang?

As John Heilemann points out in his excellent New York magazine
article, the Democrats continue to play campaign checkers while the Republicans play chess.

As a child, I would patiently wait for my dad to get home so we could drink hot tea and play a few games of chess. Before you declare my father an elitist, please know that he worked as a press operator for Western Printing, publishers of the beloved
Little Golden Books. He never made more than $10,000 a year, but raised four children on that salary. Hard to fathom, ain't it? But quietly, in those chess matches everyday, he taught me the value of thinking ahead. Of course, my Sicilian mother immediately canceled that out with her gift of hot-tempered blood, but more on that at another time.

In facing the new McCain-Palin reality, our campaign needs to react quickly
and think ahead. The two are not mutually exclusive, as any good chess player will tell you.